They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
