Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
