No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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