Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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