He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
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i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
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