I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
third nipple confirmed
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
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