So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
This is classic penis vs brain.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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