We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
