absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
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