is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
