Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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