i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
