May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
