im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I'm gonna fight the coyote
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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