Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Farmville is her only friend.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
