I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
