you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize