Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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