Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
He called his prostate his "boner button".
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
