Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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