I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
