real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
It's never too late to be topless.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
