Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
