I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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