it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
If I die, sorry about rent.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
