I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
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