OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
