Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
