you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize