That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
