Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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