you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize