can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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