Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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