how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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