the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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