I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
yea but for you.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.