I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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