i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
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