Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
my poor anus
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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