the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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