and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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