it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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