ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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