if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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