She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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