Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
