that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
