period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
It's rum buckets o'clock
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize