i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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