There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
