Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
