fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
